im losing faith.


i know im supposed to believe.
i tried.
but it didnt work.


i believed that that after 5 years, our class would be a little more united.
but we weren't.

i believed that we would get a gold for syf.
but we didnt.

i believed in friends forever.
but there isnt such thing.

i believed that i can make it.
but i didnt.

i believed that i would get a distinction for english.
but i didnt.

i believed that i would pass my emaths.
but i didnt.

i believed that i could do it.
but i couldnt.

i believed that they would change.
but they didnt.

i believe that they would not let me down.
but they did.

i believed that i could speak fluently infront of the oral examiners.
but i couldnt.

i believed i could remember all that i had tried so hard to memorise.
but i couldnt.

i believed i could write fast enough.
but i couldnt.

i believed that i mattered.
but i didnt.




i tried so hard to believe.
but it doesnt work.
no it doesnt.
it never works.